The Assessment

I'm standing at the Pearly Gates. I look to my left and St. Peter approaches.

"Am I..?" I begin.

"No, no no," he laughs, "I just wanted to check in on you and see how you are doing".

"Ah, ok then" I say. A little confused; but relieved at the same time. He motions me over to a set of La-Z Boys just off to the side.

"La-Z Boys?" I ask, slightly perplexed and amused all in one.

"Ah! They're fantastic!" he exclaims and then shows me the little remote control with all the back vibrating functions. I flop into the one next to him. They're some sort of off-white suede. Really comfortable.

"Anything to drink?" he asks. I don't feel thirsty, but when he pulls out two Dr. Peppers I grab one happily. It was my favourite drink as a child. He plops a couple of straws in them and we begin our chat.

"So..." he asks, "how's it going down there?".

I take a brief moment to reflect, and then I just speak from my heart. "You know, it's going ok. Not amazing. Not awful. Just kinda mediocre if I'm going to be completely honest with you". My mind begins to wander. I stare at the gates a bit. I realize that even though they are transparent; the clouds don't let me see what is just beyond them. Probably because I'm not actually dead yet...

I get up and walk over to one of the posts on the gates and scratch at it with my fingernail. "Is this really Pearl?" I ask. It seemed a little luminescent.

"Actually," he says "they're Opal". I nod. It made more sense. He motions me to return to my seat and I do.

"Anything else on your mind?" he prompts.

"Not really," I say "You know. It's harder, of course, than I ever thought it would be. There are so many limitations in the natural world -- things just take longer. I try my best. I've made a lot of mistakes; but that's part of the human experience. I mostly try to affect people the best way I know how. When they start infecting me, I tend to pull back. It's a dance".

"Indeed." he says through a warm smile. I'm glad he chose to make this time for me. It's nice here. Comforting. Peaceful.

"Any regrets so far?" he asks. I like that he cares.

"Well," I say "now that I'm back here and I remember more or less where I come from -- I'd have to say no. But down there; the suffering can get pretty bad. A lot of people are in the dark. They forget who they are; what they're capable of. Their hearts are ill. And, you know, it affects the rest of us" I pause for a moment to try and collect my words before I continue, "we're afraid of each other -- and we have good reason to be. It's really sad".

He sighs. I'm not the first to tell him this. I'm pretty sure he gets how cruel the world can be.

"It's really hard to not be afraid when you're down there" he says, "but you have to try and rise above it if you can; otherwise every demon in hell will play with those thoughts".

"I know" I say.

We pause. I start reflecting a bit on what he just said.

"Do you ever think it will change down there?" I ask. Naive, but hopeful.

"Sure!" he says. The optimist. I like that. "You just have to have faith, walk in love, and be loved. It's really very simple," he says with a smirk and a tinge of sarcasm.

The truth is, it should be simple; but it isn't.

"No problem," I bounce back with the same infliction of sarcasm "love and be loved. Got it!"

We laugh. It is almost impossible to achieve sometimes. Being in human form can be very complicated.

We come to the end of our Dr. Peppers. I feel like my little visit is almost up. He puts his hand on my shoulder and says, "So, are you ready to do what we sent you down there for?"

"I think so..." I say quietly. I'm slightly ashamed that I haven't been fulfilling my destiny, but I don't think I'm being judged. I think I'm being encouraged.

"Good!" he says, slaps his legs and stands up. "Good. Good. Good. You must follow your path. You'll be surprised how much easier the world can be when you are walking in your own personal authenticity."

"Right!" I say. I feel a bit energized.

"Just remember; when the fear starts to rise up inside you -- take a breath and listen to your heart. Your heart is your compass. It's the only gift we are able to provide anyone while in human form".

I smile. We hug. It's nice to have a little pep talk. I start to walk away. This was a nice visit. I turn back one more time and wave. He waves back.

Just follow my heart...





A few moments later I wake up. It's the middle of the night. I have no idea what I just dreamt about. But I did have the taste of Dr. Pepper in my mouth.